So this stranger that has been stealing glances at me walks up to me with the baby in his arms, points at me and says to the baby: see your mummy. *Uhn, For real???*
Hey YOU, here is one for the loonngggg weekend, have a Fab-U-lous one. I am still basking in the love and euphoria of all the love from Vera of verastic.com and Chioma of ThatIgboGirl.com If you missed the gist, read up here About the Weekend
In one of my recent posts Craziest 24 hours of My Life I shared with you how I had a rather dramatic day at the airport in Abuja due to the cancelled and delayed flights from Arik, FirstNation, Airpeace and Dana airlines. What I did not share with you were the weird people I encountered that just made it a crazier day. Here are a few of them, Enjoy.
- While I was waiting patiently for my 7:50 flight because I could not imagine paying an extra 11,000 for the 6:00pm flight*it was even delayed till 7:00*. I found a place to seat around the ticketing and check-in terminal because it was not time for passengers on my flight to be checked in. There was this hippie looking grandma:good stature, bohemian hair, jump suit, stilettos, gold chains. She was talking to a group of Arik air staffs, apparently, she was in Abuja and her luggage had magically found its way to Lagos. She was fuming and saying: what rubbish, I am gonna *yep, gonna* call the minister of aviation right now, you are gonna make me go really mad, why is the manager avoiding me?, why is he saying he is having a bad day? is he on his period?you will see what will happen in 2019 elections, you old people working here can’t even handle a phone and send mails, these old people are so ignorant, these old people have ruined our country,we will see how they will vote with phones in 2019, look at these young girls sitting with me;they will handle this place better. PAUSE!!!! I mean she had every right to be furious but her anger was focused on the *old* people, and this lady looked nothing less than 50 years old. Is she in denial or she’s just a distant relative of Genevieve in Devious Maids? This was an old woman with the heart of a youth *lol*
- When I checked in and was waiting at the lounge, this young guy kept pacing, looking around and then he walks up to me and says:you are going to Lagos too abi? Imagine, they have just been wasting our time, since 6pm, can you Imagine. PAUSE BRO!!!! *Please am I a staff of Airpeace, I am not even dressed like one them, can’t you see my boarding pso why are you ranting to me? I just gave a casual shrug and looked the other way. The most uncomfortable thing was that I had to look away every time he walked towards me because I did not want him talking to me again. After awhile, this guy makes funny faces at a child and after the child giggled, the mother handed him over to this stranger *for real, why would she do that right?I wondered too* Then this stranger that has been stealing glances at me walks up to me with the baby in his arms, points at me and says to the baby: see your mummy, go and meet your mummy. *see me see trouble o,Uhn, For real??? This brother was trying me o*
Now, let me tell you something else about me, I really do not public confrontations. So because I can’t start shouting in public, I have mastered the art of just pretending like the other person is dead *Nope, it’s not happening, It’s just a figment of my imagination* provided you don’t touch me though, otherwise, the dragon will be unleashed. Thankfully, the brother just walked away.
- While waiting for my flight that was delayed AGAIN till 9:20pm, I was sitting beside this middle -aged man who was already making arrangements in case the flight was eventually cancelled. I made a call to my colleague in Lagos and after the call, this man turns to me and says;
Middle-aged man: Where do you work?
Me: I work in ……..
Middle-aged man: Hmmm, that is good, no wonder, you look like an efiwe*book-worm*.
Middle-aged man: All this triangular students in school. Church, class, hostel. what is that? No fun, boring life.
Me: I had a wonderful time while I was in the University Sir.
Middle-aged man: Oooh please, I know your type. My wife was a virgin when I met her, I was like what is this? I did not even appreciate it.
Me: *too much information now, how did we get to this level of conversation now, I barely know you, I know I am approachable but this is on another level* Ok Sir. *My Angel* starts calling him on his tablet. that was my window of opportunity and I bailed.
- When we were finally in the plane at past 10p.m, this woman, her two kids, maid and a baby. The baby starts crying and the older kid screams at the Mum *Mum, I want breast milk* instead of *Mum baby wants breast milk*. There was an awkward silence and then everyone started laughing. The woman was so embarrassed.
You know how white folks always make fun of we Nigerians that before the flight even lands, we are already out of the seats and ready to move? Guess who first left their seats and got their luggage once we landed, The two white men.
Let me not get started on the staff that wanted me to pay extra cash for checking in a tube of body wash.
With Love from Me to You. xoxoxo.